I haven’t written in a few days but, though I doubt many of you care, I do have a good excuse. If you haven’t already read Making Peace, I strongly recommend that you do! It’ll provide the backstory details you need for this post but I’ll probably tell you all you really need to know in this one.
Now that you’ve read that, I’ll get on with it. My aunt was in the hospital for a few more days and then moved to hospice. In case you didn’t know, hospice centers are generally where people go to live out their last weeks. I got to visit her once in the hospital before she was moved there, which was nice because I felt like I finally got to see her at least one last time. Once she went to her new room, which was SO nice, she was still very out of it (drugs to keep her from experiencing withdraws never wore off). I was there for two straight days and half the first day, with my family. We were all waiting for it to happen because we knew what the outcome would be. Friday night my dad wanted to leave but I kept holding off until around 11:30 when he said we had to go home. We stopped at his house to get something and then he was supposed to drop me off at my mom’s. We were about one minute away from that destination when my phone screen lit up and I saw my cousin’s name popped up; I knew it wasn’t going to be good but prayed that maybe they just wanted us to come back for some reason. I answered and heard her ask, “are you home?” “No, I’m almost to my mom’s.” “Are you with your Dad?” “Yeah.” “I don’t want him to find out while he’s driving.” She said as I instantly felt the tears rushing to my eyes. “Okay…” “She’s gone…” She began to cry, which is when I let it all out, too. I told her that I loved her and we hung up. She called at 11:58 pm and we were on for 33 seconds (No, I didn’t have to look at my phone).
Monday was the showing, which was really sad. Her daughters are twenty-four and twenty-one and they lost their dad in 1994 to a car accident. Today was the funeral; there was a long procession and a beautiful service. I got to help with communion and I definitely cried. I can’t stop thinking about her, you know? She was way too young for this. Addiction is a horrible thing and I wish Kristin would have allowed us to check her into a rehab center, but what’s done is done. All I can do now is talk to her through God and remember the good times. I love you Aunt Kristin ❤ Rest in peace.
So I’m sorry that I didn’t write for awhile but I’m going through a lot… I’m doing better now that the funeral is over but it’s still been pretty hard on me. I wanted to write this in a more poetic nature, to make it a better post all around but I just can’t focus long enough to make it sound good, I really can’t think straight. So sorry guys ❤
Dear Kristin, I have truly gained a guardian angel this week, an amazing one. I’m so lucky to have gotten to know you. You touched so many lives and you’re so missed and loved down here. I hope that you and Steve are happy- finally back together again. I also hope that you, Grandpa, and Debbie are keeping each other company and catching up. The one thing that makes me feel better is that you are no longer living under the cloud of addiction, you’re free. Spread your wings and fly through the clouds. I know you’ll be watching out for me and that I’ll be talking to you a lot, especially right at first. Today there were a ton of cars and motorcycles in the procession, that’s a testament to how wonderful you were. Watch over Grandma, the girls, and the rest of the family, too. I’ll see you again someday ❤ ~Love, Sydney.